Mind like a maze with a heart that bleeds

She was nothing more than a flower child, a product of destruction and beauty

The small line that curved in her face was paved from a cold hearted man that once loved her so

The sun doesn’t shine anymore for her, only gleams in the reflection of those pale baby blue eyes

Dancing in the beam of the moon, she’s a free spirit not looming under the darkened cloud set for her path

She’s gone forever but her legacy and radiance lives within you

I’ve been doing a lot of thinking today, I can’t seem to shut my brain off. It was a year ago today that I started hair school at Marvel; I’m still baffled in the fact that 365 days have past me and I have no idea what I’ve done with them. I’ve made some new friends, lost some friends and more importantly grown as a person tremendously than I ever knew was possible. Not that it’s a bad thing to encounter so much change… It’s just that sometimes I wish I could go back to the way things were. For this reason, I’m not entirely sure. My life is great right now and I’m moving forward in my career. I just sometimes miss how simple my life was a few years ago

Now I’m faced with becoming an actual person in the real world, learning to deal with these hardships by myself and making important decisions by myself. Sometimes in a city so busy, I feel incredibly alone. Maybe I just want to be appreciated more. Maybe I just want more in general. I don’t really know. 

Feeble smile and heavy heart, I must play this right; I have to be smart
Where in the darkness the light cannot be found, the tears are pouring down
Lying on a constant basis to hush them away, inside I’m pleading someone will stay

Help is an unattainable word, but right now my vision is blurred
The thoughts are creeping up on me, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to see
See the truth, I’m not okay - my mind has wandered off astray

Before it’s too late, justice must be made
My distant soul is what longs to be cured
Fading, gone, now it’s over  

“A rather tense day is in prospect and, just this once, you may have no option but to confront someone you don’t get along with. Where some issues are concerned there can be no middle ground. Fight to win.”

I’m going to take a few minutes to commemorate someone I never knew, and now will never get the opportunity of knowing because of a series of events that took place in my own country, in the province of BC.

It truly sickens me how teens struggle with a silent anger and resentment day after day and fear their own lives because of bullying. Someone should never have the overwhelming fear to leave their own house, to socialize or to go on the web without seeing harassing messages about their lives being put in danger. I can only ask myself one question when I see news like this swarm the media; what is wrong with our society? How many more posts of suicide will it take for this to eventually stop? 

We hear about these stories and for a few moments we are overwhelmed with sadness, the bullies pretend like they knew the person and as though they are innocent in something they could have easily stopped, but continued on with. How many more teens committing suicide will it take for us to end this? For us to finally say “enough is enough”

I believe that there is some good in every person, but that good can easily be destroyed with evil that lies within us. Every person is capable of unspeakable things, but it takes a truly strong person to be a good person throughout their life. Yes, we all make mistakes. But bullying is something that is so easily prevented and not necessary in our society but it is still happening, day after day. 

Something so chilling as this story among others makes me want to do everything I can or in my power to do to stop this. Prevention is within us, let’s take a stand and end this for good. The time is now, and there is no time like the present.

RIP Amanda Todd, someone I never got the chance to meet but you will be missed. I think I can say the same for most people when I say I hope you are in a better place now, we just wish that better place could have been down here. 

It’s really horrible when you had someone in your past who you cared about and the events that occurred within that time make it hard for you in situations that revolve around the present or the future. When you put a lot of trust in someone and it backfires it’s hard to fully understand why, and although every person is different it still stays in the back of your mind when you are in new situations. Why? 

We spend so much time comparing people we know to people we meet to people we have interest in, and although they all have different qualities somehow they still get placed in the same comparison boat. And from what I’ve noticed, or at least from my personal experience it all comes down to trust. If you don’t have it, whether that be from a past experience or not; it just won’t happen. 

I hate you, I like you

Cannot look into your eyes anymore, you are so beautiful

Your words kill me, speak to me slower

Get away from me, come lay next to me

To tell someone how you really feel, what really boroughs into your soul and your thoughts is threatening. A relapse of feeling and desire, tied together with such hatred and anger that it scares you seeing yourself like this. How you can go from being so strong one second to crumbling down the next. The things our mind can do to us is as killer as a knife to your throat.

I continually wonder if the universe is ever in your favour. When you’re trying to move on from a situation or someone, you do your best to remove yourself from any memory that ties you to that thing or individual - and just when you think you’ve achieved that, that person or that thing comes waltzing back into your life like no time has passed. It’s as if you’ve spent all this time working on yourself and making yourself better and moving on and thinking you’ve been successful until something so small and really irrelevant or as relevant as a message can send you flying back to square one. And when you open your eyes and realize where you’ve landed, you wonder how you could have done so well to sink back in so fast.

A relapse of affection is a dangerous thing.